I may be teaching Language Arts right now, but I promise this is NO Creative Writing project. I honestly don't think I could be this creative! The stories and events you are about to hear are entirely true. In fact they are a pretty good representation of what my life is really like.

Tuesday morning started like another. I was up at 5:30 to get ready for another day of teaching. The girls were up at 6:30 to begin preparing for another day of learning. We were out the door right on time at 7:15. Nothing and I mean NOTHING was out of the ordinary. After we arrived at the school with no questionable or concerning events, I dropped the girls off at their respective classes.

As the morning announcements began my shoulder began to itch. I was wearing a shirt that I have worn many times in the past two years. It is a black and white shirt and the arms are lace. I have always dried it on the delicate setting. However, we just had our heating element replaced last week after it blew. My best guess is that the new heating element puts out much more heat than the old one did. As the day went on I noticed I was itching more and more. Between second and third periods I looked down and everywhere that I had scratched a hole had formed in my shirt. It was disintegrating as the day went on.

I RAN to the back of my classroom and grabbed my jacket. I zipped it up to the neck to hide. The itching didn't stop. In between classes I would unzip my jacket and look at the damage done. It was always worse than before. My shirt was literally falling apart as I wore it. By noon the sun had come out and people kept asking why are wearing a jacket. This made my day even worse because then I had to explain that my shirt was falling apart. If I made up a lame excuse I could just see them trying to blame my husband for abuse or something!

At about 2:00 I checked the calendar just to realize that I had a parent/teacher meeting at 3:00. At this point I FINALLY give in and run to the front office to call Clark. My loving, amazing, wonderful husband dropped what he was doing, drove home, ironed a new shirt for me, and brought it up to the school for me. Once I had the new shirt on I was sure my adventure for the day was over.

The parent/teacher meeting went well. I picked the girls up and we headed home. Melisa had most of her homework done, I was headed to workout, meat was defrosting for dinner, and our nightly routine was in full swing. Before I knew what was happening, Cali came RUNNING into my bedroom crying "There's a ba in my ear! There's a BA in my ear! There is a BAAA in my ear!" We thought that she might have heard a fly or gnat buz by causing her to think there was a bug in her ear. We tried to calm her down and tell her there was no bug in her ear. Cali proceeds to throw her hands down on the table and say "NOOOOO, there is a BAAALLLL in my ear!"

For the second time today, panic sets in. I lay her down in the bathroom counter, shine a flashlight in her ear and sure enough, there is a tiny red ball in her ear. It seems Melisa was playing with aquadots and Cali found one. She decided it would be fun to see how well it fit in her ear. She immediately realized what a bad idea it was and started trying to dig it out. As she dug the ball was pushed farther and farther into her ear.

My Paramedic Father and EMT husband laid her out on the kitched counter and procceeded to try to get it out of her ear wtih the suction bulb that we got from the hospital when she was born. Of course that didn't work, so we were off to he ER. She had NO pain. Everyone else in the ER waiting room did have pain. Guess who had the longest wait? Oh yeah, it was us.

We were at the hospital for about 4 hours. It took the doctor all of five minutes to attach different sized attachements to the end of a suction unit (yeah that is a nice way to say a vacuum). They sucked the ball right out of her ear. They asked us if we wanted to keep the ball...if you could have seen the look I gave them, they knew the answer was no!

We got home at 9:30 or so and then had to do dinner, bathtime, and bedtime. Needless to say we were HOURS past bedtime. By the time I was finally able to go to sleep I was out cold with strange dreams of disintigrating shirts and tiny balls stuck in ears. Hmmmm....wonder where that came from?

Thankfully Wednesday was an uneventful day! I don't think I could have lived out a second day that seemed more like a Creative Writing project one of my students would write rather than my REAL life.